This Arab News article pushes a rather sharp stick into the eye of those who think Saudi women incapable. It also shows how feeble the arguments against women’s driving are.
Perhaps the King can hold a special award ceremony for her. He’s in favor of women’s driving, but doesn’t want to get too far ahead of where society stands on the issue. Ms. Al-Mutairy’s example could be a good push in the direction of opening the streets to Saudi women.
Girl defies ban on driving to save many lives
JEDDAH: A teenage girl defied a Saudi ban on women drivers to save her father and brother from the Nov. 25 floods. Malak Al-Mutairy took some rope and drove her father’s GMC to the low-lying Qous Valley where water had nearly submerged the car her family was standing on top of.
She parked her car at an elevated position on the road and waded into the water as far as she could before throwing the rope to her brother, Al-Madinah newspaper reported.
The brother tied the rope on the car and then Malak slowly towed the vehicle out of the water. When her brother fell into the water she returned to help him. Her father Fawaz Al-Mutairy, and brother Faiz were overwhelmed by the floods on their way to buy sacrificial animals for Eid Al-Adha.
There were other submerged cars with people inside them crying for help. Despite her father’s pleas not to return, Malak managed to tow eight more cars with dozens of people inside to safety.
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December:19:2009 - 09:33
Hats off to her! She is not only a good driver but very brave and a good-hearted person too.
But I have never quite understood what logic the Saudi officials give for this ban. There were no cars in 7th century, so obviously Islam has nothing to do with it. Or is there a Hadith that says women can’t drive camels?
And what kind of a monarch is this who can’t take a strong stand regarding such an ordinary issue? If he can fire a religious scholar for criticising mixing of genders at KAUST, what stops him from vetoing this ridiculous ban on driving? All he has to say is that this ban has nothing to do with Islam and is a Bidaa.
December:19:2009 - 10:21
All of my students in my morning class already know how to drive! Their fathers have taught them to how to drive in the desert. I agree this young Saudi woman is very courageous. I hope we can all drive soon. I am paying my driver (not mine…he is rented out) too much money and my husband is very annoyed at my requests like I need to buy a black shirt so my daughter can have Sponge Bob pressed on it for the bazarre at her school.
December:19:2009 - 14:04
Bravo to her! I do think that given the opportunity, more girls, and more teens in general would respond this way to family emergencies (hopefully less drastic ones). Kudos to her father and brother also, for being resourceful, and probably primarily to her father for teaching her to drive in the desert. It seems the desert is a blessing in this instance.
I do hope this contributes to an evolution of driving in Saudi, with women driving, and also safer roads. Perhaps the 2 will be entwined.
Daisy–even an absolute monarch is wise not to provoke his subjects too much, if he wants to keep his throne and his head, with a minimum of repression.
Sparky–how old are your students?
December:19:2009 - 14:09
Chiara,
“Minimum of repression” is an understatement for Saudi Arabia. He didn’t mind taking a strong stand regarding mixing of sexes at KAUST and is believed to be a benevolent monarch. That’s why I made that comment.
December:19:2009 - 14:15
Chiara that is classified information…I am sorry I can pass it to John only
K just kidding…Ahhh what would we do without our sense of humor.
December:19:2009 - 14:23
The 1979 was a marked one for Saudi Arabia. In addition to the siege at Mecca, the Shah was overthrown. The Saudi government took very clear notice of what happens when a ruler–even an absolute one–get too far ahead of his society.
December:19:2009 - 14:30
The shah card aye?
Anyhoo as easily as one can become ahead one can as easily fall behind
I agree keeping up pace is important but the desire is very strong across a fairly broad spectrum.
December:19:2009 - 16:23
I do agree this young woman needs to be honored not only within Saudi Arabia but as a stellar example of humanity, compassion and capability to the rest of the world too.
It seems that the Nike motto works best…. Just Do It!
December:19:2009 - 17:20
Daisy–yes but there are more repressive regimes, and KAUST is a carefully structured island unto itself; not the same as licensing women drivers.
John–that is exactly the example that I was thinking of, and the one that has given the clerics in Saudi so much power.
Sparky–ok, no worries, I don’t want you to lose your top secret clearance! LOL
December:20:2009 - 03:25
Malak heroic adventure should be documented in a movie, 3 book deals, two graphic novels, 26-episode cartoons and a food chain restaurant!
oh oh and a Play!
Its without a doubt a stick in the eye, she is a hero on many accounts.. rescuing all those people is just one of them.
December:20:2009 - 03:35
This young lady should be honored for her bravery. I think this a clear example for the argument of women driving in Saudi Arabia.
However, women driving in Saudi is illegal. And as such, the King cannot be seen to condone the breaking of any laws. So I think a ceremony would be out of the question. But I think that this an opportune time to bring the subject up and use examples such as Ms. Al-Mutairy’s heroic actions to push for removing the ban. And I can assure you, there are many Saudi Women who have been behind the wheel to perform some sort of heroic action. So maybe it’s time to organize a semi-official “campaign” to push for this?
I’m a Saudi man and as such, I can’t presume to speak on behalf of Saudi women in any way or form. But if were a Saudi woman, my priorities would lie else where. I’d fight to remove the male “guardianship” system. I would fight to make Saudi governmental organizations more female friendly. I would strive to have Saudi women in the Shura Council. And that’s just to name a few.
My point is, and this is what I feel is what women, at least those around me, want more substantial changes and driving isn’t high on that list.
December:20:2009 - 04:27
John and Chiara,
So does that mean that if the entire Saudi Arabia is divided into enclosed sections (islands) of residential compounds and KAUST-like places, Islamic law doesn’t have to be applied there at all?
The important question is – do they want to apply it or not – making enclosed islands of spaces with differential laws doesn’t make sense. If they think these laws are perfectly fine with them, why not apply them in the whole of KSA? And if they think these laws are wrong for them, why make concessions in these enclosed places? I am of course for liberal laws, not for Shariah, but I am just talking about the absurdity in this system.
The point is that segregation is Islamic and the king is able to abolish it and can even be rough with the dissenting Islamic clerics anout it, while ban on women’s driving doesn’t have any Islamic basis and still he is not able to abolish it. Isn’t this absurd?
Talal,
Your intentions are very noble, but your thoughts are misguided. You think that being a man you shouldn’t speak about women’s rules, while the truth is that Saudi women can get their freedom only if Saudi men support them. In the present situation, Saudi women can’t get anything on their own, without their men’s support.
Of course, my personal feeling is that even if this ban is lifted, majority of Saudi women will not drive themselves and will continue to use a paid driver instead.
Only it will give them the freedom of movement in public in a moment of urgency when there is no male driver available.
And now that I say it, perhaps here we also arrive at the answer to my query above about absurdity in this driving law. This law is there to restrict the women’s movement and not give them the freedom to move about in public on their own. Only Saudi authorities and other people who are sympathetic to the Saudi system don’t want to say it in so many words. hence, they give any number of illogical reasons but the real one.
Seeing from this perspective, it’s really not a question of a helpless monarch. Considering that other restrictive laws for women have the king’s approval there, most probably this rule also has his approval.
December:20:2009 - 07:58
Actually, women’s driving is not illegal in Saudi Arabia. King Abdullah himself has said so. He says that while the law permits it, society does not and until society is ready to change, he’s not eager to push the issue.
The most anyone can point to in terms of legalisms about women’s driving are a few fatwas. As we know, fatwas are subject to revision or to being superseded by changing circumstances. This issue is more than ripe for being brought into the 21st C. Or even the 20th!
Yes, there are other issues that are more important than women’s driving and Saudi women make that pretty clear. But progress isn’t only achieved through fixing the big things first. Fixing the little things can demonstrate that change isn’t necessarily harmful, thus encouraging the willingness to make bigger changes.
December:20:2009 - 08:07
John,
While women driving was not illegal to begin with, I do believe that it has become so within city limits sometime in the early 90s after the demonstration by women drivers right after the Gulf War. I will have to check and get back to you.
I agree with you on small changes paving the way for bigger ones. It’s a very logical approach. However, speaking with women in my immediate circle, it’s very clear that they would like the bigger things changed first. This belief stems from these women thinking that any political capital should be spent on what really matters rather than being squandered on smaller issues.
December:20:2009 - 08:43
No, only a flurry of fatawa came from the Gulf War driving demonstration. This was an issue that the US Embassy–among many others–brought up with the Saudi government. There is no law prohibiting women’s driving. Again, this is on the authority of King Abdullah more recently.
But a large part of the problem is that Saudi law is mostly uncodified. That means that it’s always a work in progress, with individual judges asserting their beliefs about what is or isn’t illegal. I suspect there are judges out there who could live with women’s driving, but they’d do so only at great professional peril. The default position in the KSA seems to be accepting no change until it becomes so popular that there’s no way to avoid it–for example, camera phones and satellite dishes.
Perhaps, as the government reforms the legal system and codifies laws, it can state affirmatively that women have the right to drive! That would clarify things.
It doesn’t have to be that way, of course. King Faisal ended chattel slavery in the Kingdom by royal decree. Abdullah could do the same. But perhaps his calculus is like that of the Saudi women you mention: he doesn’t want to burn up political capital on the smaller issues…
December:20:2009 - 08:52
Here’s a story, from New York City, about clashes between the resident population and an ‘alien’ one that seeks to impose its moral values on the whole community:
December:20:2009 - 09:41
Maybe Lance Armstrong will join them:
http://11.media.tumblr.com/vVmbDWseNohngbi5zjpLOjZYo1_500.jpg
The Freedom Riders ride monthly through my city–I’m not sure why. And except in the summer, bow to the elements regarding apparel. Needless to say, I’ve never been in the right place at the right time to catch the ones who prefer to go “commando”.
December:20:2009 - 09:56
Not that there are many bicycle riders in Riyadh, but something like this would surely lead to exploding heads.
BTW, the OIC-sponsored resolution to outlaw commentary defamatory to religion (well, some religions) is less popular this year:
December:20:2009 - 13:49
John,
What does it mean? Does it mean that women driving in the cities can still be held up and perhaps be punished even if the law permits it? Does the legal code mean anything at all there? It needn’t be codified – the Quran and Sunna are there for everyone to refer to.
The people in the UN should get psychitric help for supporting anti-hatespeech resolution.
December:20:2009 - 14:40
I’ve been working on a list of reasons that I’ve heard why women shouldn’t or can’t drive. They ALL can be answered or worked around. Feel free to edit or add to it. Maybe we (collectively at xrdarabia) can compile the best and most sound arguments. Let them be set free into the internet and see how things change. I can’t recall if I had posted this here before. Anyway, see my list of responses below:
* What if she gets a flat tire? She might get raped.
- She can lock her doors and call for help. Better yet, she can travel with a young non-driving mahram or other women, if this is a legitimate fear. This will help provide safety, if men can’t be trusted to refrain from acting like animals.
* Saudi Arabia has other problems to fix first.
- That’s a plain and simple stall tactic. Allowing females with foreign drivers licenses to drive first can be quickly implemented. This small change won’t interrupt other problems that need fixing in the KSA. Later, licenses can be issued to women over a certain age (ie. 30 years old) after undergoing driving instruction. Female driving instructors are already available. Later still, all women could be permitted to get a license IF THEY CHOOSE. The whole program could be stair-stepped into place over the course of a few years in order to ease the shock.
* Saudi women don’t want this.
- That’s correct, many Saudi women do not want this. They don’t have to drive and no female should be forced to drive. But, some Saudi women do want this. Let them participate if their family discusses and decides upon it.
* If she can’t speak with non-mahram men then how will she talk with a police officer?
- A female official can respond to the scene, if needed. Otherwise a woman should be permitted to speak with a male policeman in the case of an emergency. It’s not like they are arranging a sexual encounter.
* Women don’t need to drive since they have drivers.
- Some women desire to not have a driver or cannot afford one. We should allow each to decide for themselves according to their family situation. There is no need for one solution for all. What makes more sense after all … a woman driving herself or a woman alone in a car with an unrelated male driver?
* The roads are too dangerous with crazy male drivers.
- Then make the traffic police enforce the laws. This can be changed.
* This is a western idea pushed to ruin Saudi society.
- No, this is practical idea designed to give some women a little more liberty. It won’t ruin Saudi society. It will only ruin one very old taboo that should have been removed years ago.
* Women will be bad drivers.
- Men are already bad drivers. See, I can generalize too!
* But, the Jews …
- Forget the Jews for a second and think for yourself.
* Women will have their vision impaired if they drive while covered.
- Then how do Muslim women drive in other countries? I don’t understand how a hijab (alone) could be any more restricting than a regular head scarf that you see all over the world.
* There’s no reason for it.
- Would you say the same for men if the situation were reversed? If not, why?
December:20:2009 - 16:23
Because there’s not much in the way of written law in the KSA, it means that there’s no written law to cover most behaviors in the Kingdom. Women’s driving is only one of the lacunae. Nearly everything is left to the judgment of a Shariah educated qadi or judge. If the law enforcement personnel believe something to be against the (unwritten) law, they make an arrest. What happens then is left to several layers of bureaucracy. That bureaucracy–both law enforcement, religious police, and the courts–are not bound by precedent nor, obviously, unwritten laws.
Kafka anyone?
December:20:2009 - 16:30
Just a quick response…
For your first point, the flat tire, you left out the most basic solution: She can replace the damn flat tire! Millions of women do it. Saudi women are not delicate flowers that would shatter doing that much labor. As Tareq Al-Maeena wrote in a recent column, the fact that young Saudi males don’t know how to change a tire might argue against this, but then he recommends a basic course on car maintenance in high schools. Girls’ schools could do it, too!
Your second-to-the-last point: Hijab might not be an impediment, though it would cut down on important peripheral vision. It could, perhaps, be pulled back a bit to avoid that. The real issue is niqab. Some are so gauze-like that they’re no more obtrusive than sunglasses. Others, though–I’m thinking of the leather masks worn in some regions–would pretty much blind a woman to everything but what’s straight ahead of her. But the solution, too, is easy… don’t drive while wearing niqab! If that means that some women can’t drive on moral principle, then so it goes… there are entire cultures that eschew motor vehicles.
December:20:2009 - 21:07
@ #22
John,
First, please tell me that is not true about young Saudi males and flat tires. I’m hoping that is an exaggeration.
Secondly, thanks for the suggestions to my list. I’ll try to incorporate that into my future answers. Maybe we could put them all into a condensed government-like pamphlet entitled … “Women Driving and You”.
LOL!
December:20:2009 - 21:46
Perhaps Al-Maeena is exaggerating. I suspect not, however.
If you’ve never changed a tire, it can be a daunting challenge. If you’ve never even seen a tire being changed, I guess it could be panic-inducing.
December:20:2009 - 22:08
Ratherdashing and John,
Almost no car owner who drives a car in India changes a flat tyre himself or herself – regardless of gender – we have mechanics along the road every few hundred metres to do this for them. If they are going on a long journey on isolated roads, they take a driver who changes the flat tyre, never the owner, whether a man or a woman.
So I can perfectly relate this to why Saudi men can’t change a flat tyre. In fact like India, they can have mechanics along the road to change flat tyres for them if they can’t do it themselves. In countries like India and even more so in Saudi Arabia, a car is a luxury item that everyone can’t afford. Only people with money can have a car. That’s the reason why car drivers are a fashion in Saudi Arabia – it’s a sign of prestige for the women to be driven rather than drive themselves. That’s why I said I don’t think majority of Saudi women will drive even if this ban is lifted. If Indians have money, even men in India like to have a driver. They drive themselves only when they can’t afford a driver. In the West, driving oneself is a sign of independence, but in these countries, being driven is a sign of prestige.
But in case of emergency, women shouldn’t be prohibited from driving – that’s why this attitude has to change.
John, when you were in India, were you driven or did you drive yourself?
December:20:2009 - 22:12
I think the only care people IN CHARGE have is the economic cost…let’s break it down economically!
IT Is BLOODSUCKING…!…!…!
And Talal people have to learn how to crawl before they walk. Do you honestly expect to turn over a guardianship concept when you have programs like “MY guardian knows what is best for me.” coming from princesses who are probably already driving around with completely tinted windows and special license plate. I got one hour to leave for work and the driver who supposedly knew where the bank was drove me around in circles nearly to closing time finally had me talk to his “brother” and then we stumbled upon it by accident AND the jerk expected me to give him a high five. He put his hand out for me to slap it. I guess because I am American he expected me to do that!!!! I wanted to slap his head and everybody elses. I was seeking out a woman’s branch!
My first license plate in Saudi is going to read “007 F-BOMB”. AND DON’t anyone STEAL THAT LOL
December:20:2009 - 22:18
Chiara, I’m just waiting for this EVOluTion and it is going take a whole lots of revelation.
I’m also waiting for the day when we will no longer grow wisdom teeth because they are basically non essential as we no longer need to chew on roughage in which our appendix would break down.
HOwever I am still getting a whole shitload of roughage in my diet.
December:21:2009 - 03:24
John–Indeed, Kafke is best in literary form only.
Sparky–I guess it would take Revelation. Glad to hear about the roughage in your diet.
Ratherdashing–good list and idea. If they don’t already have one, an automobile association (like AAA, or CAA) with men’s and women’s branches would be a good idea for road emergencies, road safety, driving lessons, travel registration (ie your plan therefore can find you if delayed) motoring tourism, etc. Driver’s Ed for all as a non-credit obligatory course in high school would be a good option too. Mine through the CAA included basic maintenance and repairs (including changing a tire, but not a practicum on that), as well as driving skills, laws, and road safety. How to drive in flash floods, sand storms, etc would probably replace my lessons on snow blizzards, zero visibility, ice and snow, black ice, and how to get out of being stuck in snow; or my BC friend’s how to drive in a mudslide lessons.
I have done all the snow manoeuvres in vivo, and even changed a tire twice: 1) called the CAA, and waited for the guy, checked for the spare tire after calling, oops none, called back to tell them to bring one, guy already there, knew him (oh, I didn’t recognize you with your clothes on!–I had taught him swimming), told him about the lack of a spare, he politely asked if I would mind if he checked again, I obliged, he lifted the mat thingy in the trunk and there it was, and there was his polite 12 year old smile on his 16 year old face;
2) it was a dark and stormy night, or at least dark and isolated on a country road, and I was driving home solo, when my tire blew, there was one dark farmhouse in sight, but I thought rather than try to rouse them at 1:30am and terrify all of us, I could make it home on the flat (too dark to change a tire manually myself unless totally necessary), oops not really, decided to stop at the golf club dining facility in case kitchen staff still there after a soiree, made it as close as I could and pulled to the side of the road, put the emergency brake and flashers on and was about to get out and walk to the kitchen area, when a car pulled up behind me, stayed put, locked doors, and waited for nice person/pervert to reach me, seemed nice so I rolled down the window, meanwhile he seemed to hesitate and almost walked away then stuck it out, we chatted and he asked if I had a jack and a spare, yes to both, although the spare in that car was a doughnut (by now I was a flat tire pro), and he changed it as I looked on encouragingly, after which he was relaxed enough to say that he stopped because with my short hair from the back he thought I was a man, and when he saw I was a woman he almost left because he was afraid of false accusations, as much as I was afraid of a rapist, we shook hands and went on our way, at breakfast the next morning I told my parents about the flat, my father using his best don’t make hormonal teenage daughter cry voice asked if I drove on the rim, mother jumped in with she can drive on it if she needs to, father adding he only wanted to know what he had to change/fix, I said I didn’t know and I had driven from x to y, father doing admirable job of not making hormonal teenage daughter cry just went out to view the tire, the rim of which was, well, you know, “unwell”.
I am sure Saudis can manage the above or use their cellphones to obviate the need.
December:21:2009 - 03:41
Addendum: Kafke, and Kafkaesque, equally preferable in literary form.
December:21:2009 - 08:15
Chiara,
Thanks. You’re correct when you suggest the need for drivers training and auto clubs. Allowing women to drive in the KSA will take other types of support to put this in place. I still suggest letting women with licenses from foreign countries to drive first. This is a small first step that shouldn’t be that difficult to implement. They can be the forerunners of something larger.
Your tire changing story reminded me of a situation I was in once. When I was about 17 yrs old I was returning from a construction job in the evening with a guy co-worker. We were out on the highway near nothing and saw a station wagon pulled over. It was oddly parked and we stopped to see if somebody needed help. As we approached and looked into the open door we saw an attractive young woman in the back of the vehicle trying to get her spare tire out. She had a flat and was going to fix it herself. When she saw the two of us her expression changed to a look of sheer panic. I can remember it clearly. We were embarrassed for her and began to help her. She never trusted us even as we were finishing up the job. She could barely even speak to us she was so nervous. The event helps me remember how vulnerable women feel around men in situations like that. So I understand the fears involved with this issue in the KSA.
December:21:2009 - 12:53
Ratherdashing–I think your idea about letting all women with a foreign licence drive, ie expats and Saudi, would be a good one, as long as other women without that advantage were reassured their rights would follow on soon, otherwise there might be a dramatic rift between the haves and have nots which the reactionaries would be sure to foster or widen, giving credence to the idea that women can’t get along, and are too emotional to drive. Another way would be to follow on that shortly with a driver’s test open to all those desert drivers, to get the numbers of women drivers up relatively fast so it was normalized by them, and they wouldn’t be such a targeted minority.
Thank you for your tire changing story. It is really sad that we have to feel this degree of apprehension about situations which should be easy good Samaritan ones. Part of why I drove on the rim and didn’t change the tire myself, was that I was afraid to leave the protection of the car on that road (also recognition that my sister inherited all the family mechanical and strength genes).
In a similar vein, early one academic semester I was working in my office when the building was closed on the weekend. I went to the combination coffee/photocopy room and was turning all relevant machines on when in walked a man I didn’t recognize. We looked at each other with fear barely hidden under civility, and did a quick size up. I decided that friendliness couldn’t hurt, introduced myself as one of the junior faculty, and he quickly said he was one of the new grad students–relief all round (no guarantees on either side but careers hanging in the balance as a deterrent). This also gave us a fast role identity, and we talked about our research, and went to my office so I could give him a bunch of photocopied articles relevant to his. We both new why we were initially afraid of each other, but never acknowledged it. Also, all the male faculty made it a habit when coming in during off hours, to say a loud hello and give me a wave as they walked in so I wouldn’t be frightened. They did this just out of general consideration–very thoughtful, as you have been about the challenge for Saudi women in this regard.
December:21:2009 - 14:47
Good news! We don’t need to wait on evolution to stop growing our wisdom teeth!!!
“But some scientists are beginning work on stopping the teeth from appearing altogether, so that we might bioengineer these teeth out of existence before evolution does it for us. Because there’s a window of time in which there’s no third molar, it might be possible to administer a laser or a chemical agent that would prevent the tooth growth. Preliminary studies have shown some success in dogs and rats [source: Silvestri, Singh].”
Also mommy made sure my wisdom teeth were surgically removed before they they caused trouble to my other teeth. They were quite compacted. Thank GOd for science and operations. But hey some people’s wisdom teeth are perfect and non troublesome. Yeah
December:22:2009 - 16:48
Talal, there are no laws in Saudi Arabia, and there certainly is no law prohibiting women from driving. It’s only the ridiculous and misogynist fear of the Saudi men that the women would, instead of doing the shopping and going to work and picking up the kids, go chasing after men the way they chase after women.
Completely forgoing the fact that most women really use their time in pursuit of loftier goals.
I agree that the ”guardian” system should be removed asap.
Daisy, Women ”drove” horses and camels so it is sunnah for women to ”drive’their own means of transport. But KSA is very often at odds with sunnah and the example of the prophet.
Hurray, hurray hurray for the heroic girl! That is one cool amazon!
Sparky, share a photo of your car, numberplate, and the roadblocks you will cause!
December:23:2009 - 22:02
Aafke,
Not only is there no “law” that prohibits women driving, but the last update to the traffic laws in the KSA did not mention the gender of the driver. Hence, it can be assumed that it does not matter if male or female were behind the wheel.
Attitudes toward women driving are not codified into law. They only exist in the imagination of men.
December:23:2009 - 22:11
@31 Chiara,
I don’t understand the fear of the new grad student. Did he think he’d be accused of something? Where did this take place? What could really happen in the copy room? Might he have just felt uncomfortable making you uncomfortable, similar to my tire changing story?
December:24:2009 - 08:45
Ratherdashing–sorry if I wasn’t clear enough. This happened in a small separate building which was closed for the weekend. There was no one else in the building, and we were both there because we had keys to the building. As these were unscheduled hours we were surprised to see each other, and me to see him since he was there before me and had used a different entrance (one that didn’t go past my office anyway). It is possible he was only uncomfortable because we surprised each other, but he looked worse than I felt, and I am reasonably good at keeping a calm face (by temperament, and medical-psychiatry training). Since he was entitled to be there, I only wonder if he didn’t have that reflex about being alone in an isolated place with a woman, and worrying about how he would be perceived and what would be said (the femi-nazis have given us all a bad name). I guess what could happen in a copy room with no one around is the same as what could happen anywhere with no one around, but most often doesn’t.
I should say there are 2 contexts I hadn’t mentioned, one was with strangers getting into the building, some of them looking for solace from the architecture, and some thinking the subject matter made it a place of refuge. And the second was my reputation. Now that I think about it, maybe he did know who I was, especially if he attended the grad student orientation, and had heard one of the favourite stories about me at the time: that I had called campus security on another man on a Saturday in similar circumstances, ie closed building in there alone.
That time, I had walked into the building, expecting and realizing that I was alone, and then noticing that I was alone, except for a large male form sleeping face down on the couch in the waiting area in front of my office door. I walked past him from afar (he was on the opposite wall across a large area), trying to guess if he was one of the street people who maybe got in, or just a drunk guy sleeping it off, or… Couldn’t tell anything except size being more like a man than a woman, and by clothing unlikely a full-time street person. I went into my office, and was going to ignore him and work, with the door on automatic lock as usual, but then I thought, how can I work without going to the copy room (also the fax room, printer room) and more importantly make my tea there? So, I called campus security to come and assess the situation. In other circumstances, ie people around, I would have done it myself, but not alone, and not with emergency medicine scenarios in my brain of what waking a drunk/drugged person can incur. So I persuaded them to come, and told them I would be leaving the building and calling back for an all clear.
I went to a nearby mall, bought a tea, and called back about a half hour later. The bewildered, but polite, security guy told me they woke the sleeping man, and he was one of the female staff’s husband, and he knew me. “Oh perfect”, thought I, “the architect husband of the PhD Administrator/ Graduate student coordinator (ie someone with the power to make my life miserable)”. So I said x’s husband? No, y’s husband, she is here working and now they are both in her office, and he said he won’t sleep on the couch any more. Hmmm, worse, y was an African Canadian, and a Jehovah’s Witness, with all kinds of “let’s make sure sure she doesn’t feel discriminated against for gender, race, and religion” attached to her by the director, because he had been accused of biases before. Plus, I had just called security on a young well, though casually, dressed black man for sleeping on a couch, while his wife worked in a back office. I thanked the security officer, and walked back, and straight into her office, where they were both sitting. I apologized profusely to both, and made it clear I had no idea who the sleeping form was, and why I thought to get security involved, and that my initial thought was the architect (verrrrry Nordic) even after I was told it was a staff member’s husband. They were gracious but somewhat discomfitted as one would expect. Over time they relaxed about me.
The Graduate Director (not the woman coordinator, the prof who was the graduate director) made a big to do about it, especially as I had previously said that in daytime hours I didn’t see the necessity of extra locks. He was sharing the story widely, as was his want, and was making pointed jokes, until I said “You are forgetting how much time I have spent in medical and psychiatric emergency rooms”, which stopped the joking part of it. However, it remained a favourite story among grad students and faculty.
Lucky for the next guy I “caught” looking like he was picking a lock to the side door entrance, his grad student wife was standing beside him. Lucky for me too, as he was a lawyer with a major law firm.
I let them in, and we had a laugh about my “reputation”. She apologized for looking like a damsel in distress who had to call her husband to come and try to get her key to work. Needless to say this all happened in very Politically Correct territory–which in fact often creates extra tensions.
Thanks for asking, I hope I clarified things. Sad we are all so discomfitted.
December:24:2009 - 15:21
@36 Chiara,
Thanks for all the detail! I’ve got it now.
I guess it boils down to the inherent problems of unrelated men and women being alone together. Whether changing tires or making copies, we are all subject to the unwritten rules of the sexes.
That said. The unwritten rules should not prevent the KSA from allowing women the modern convenience of driving.
December:24:2009 - 18:39
Ratherdashing–you are welcome and I agree. We are always subject to the unwritten rules of the sexes, and especially when alone together. Most of us negotiate them well, and from practicing in various situations growing up. None of this should prevent women in KSA from driving or many other activities, eg work, study, etc.
January:08:2010 - 15:30
Really interesting items that shows how women have been unfairly restricted. Hopefully women in KSA will take up driving and other activities because they clearly can.
June:10:2010 - 03:24
Do agree with all the responses!!!
I think that, parents should make their children grow in every aspect. If they make them teach everything, then they are the ones who can take care of themselves and also their parents too!!
Thanks to the girl, who saved her parents with her driving skills. Driving or any other field it might be parents should encourage their children to learn it. EOD its the children who will stay and are the future of this mother Earth.
Its no more history now, where in you are supposed not to learn anything, especially Women, who are also great in handling businesses now a days!!!